Parenting Tips: The Purpose of Schedules

As adults, schedules are very important. We need to know when to go to work, when our doctor’s appointment is, and when the movie starts. Schedules are also important for children but for different reasons than adults. Schedules provide predictability for children. This predictability provides comfort for most children. They learn "first I have lunch, them I’m changed, and next is nap time" - as the simplest example.

When kids are provided with predictability, they are typically more agreeable to the multitude of changes throughout the day. There are few things that can throw a wrench in this cycle. The first is when there is a day where the schedule must be altered, or in some families where the schedule is unable to set and changes daily. In these situations, you can restore some sense of predictability by explaining the new schedule of events. Many children will be okay with these changes, although missed naps or delayed feeding schedules will affect mood and disposition.

On the other hand, some children are very rigid, and the slightest bit of change to their schedule causes turmoil. These children will not go with the flow when there is slight or major change to the schedule. These kids will need to have transition time warnings built into their schedule, even when the schedule is fixed. A transition time warning is letting the child know that the activities or focus will be changing 5 minutes from now (or the time frame you determine is best for your child). It is important when giving transition time warnings that you follow through and do actually change the activity within that time frame. It’s easy to give a 5 minute warning and keep talking with your friends for 15 minutes. I’ve been guilty of that.

So, remember for a happy and more responsive child, help them throughout the day with predictability. For further questions about transition time warnings, contact me.

Parenting tips has been brought to you by Lisa Klipfel, MFT, a child therapist with an office in San Clemente. Future parenting tips will highlight developmental milestones, positive discipline, bonding and so much more. Read more about Lisa here.